Contraceptives May Double Risk of Stroke.

My favorite line: “benefits [of contraception] still outweigh the risks for most users.” Growing numbers of “most users” would disagree.

Many people would consider the phrase “contraception-free pharmacy” an oxymoron, but I think it’s a badge of honor. It shows a pro-fertility, pro-family mentality that is well aware that not only is the Pill (and other contraceptives) not a panacea, but that it has terrible side effects that wreck the physical, mental, social, relational, and spiritual state of women and families, and thus is bad for society at large.

DMC Pharmacy, one of the rare contraception-free pharmacies in the United States, near Washington, DC, has closed its doors effective two days ago due to lack of customer and financial support. CNA covers the story here.

This is so sad and frustrating on several levels. It takes so much courage and sacrifice to make the decision to go against the grain and do the right thing, and to not be supported on principal by two large parishes (totaling 20,000+ parishioners!) says a lot about those parishes. I mean, I’m taking a leap on my inference here, but I find it hard to believe that two parishes really living their faith could not find it in themselves to help a brutha out. But this is the DC area. I used to live in the DC area, and though the DC area is a quasi-mecca for a cluster of super faithful, rock solid Christians, the Catholic population is notably unfaithful in the area of contraception and related issues especially. Boo, those two parishes. (I could be wrong about the parishes, but it just doesn’t add up.)

Which begs the question, how can pro-fertility, pro-family communities (especially faith communities support their local pharmacies? (To find a contraception-free pharmacy, start here. There’s not that many listed, but I know there’s got to be a lot more. If you know of one, connect them with OMS so they can get listed!)

• Make sure that they have NFP information, brochures and flyers at the pharmacy. (General NFP/ Contraception Side Effects brochures available at One More Soul. Specific ones about classes in your area can be found through your Catholic Diocesan Family Life Offices, or local NFP Chapters.) If you’re an NFP Instructor/ Promoter, this is a must!
• Get bulletin announcements published in your church bulletin! We absolutely need to be supporting our brothers and sisters for making courageous decisions. Ask the Family Life/ Respect Life Office to email a bulletin announcement about your local non-contraceptive pharmacy (word the announcement as you wish for maximum effect in your area) to all local parishes. They should have a blanket email list. If they don’t, submit a hard copy for mailing/ newsletters. If this isn’t an option, consider contacting your pastor to suggest this. If he’s on board enough (he should be!), he may even go further and include it in a homily! (It can and does happen.)
• Put flyers up in your church/ supportive community: It’s psychologically shown in marketing/ communications studies that someone has to see/ hear something 5-8 times before remembering it, and having it sink in. That’s why the same commercials are shown over and over, and this is why any publicity should contain several types of media (print, verbal announcement/ radio, email/ internet, etc.) This can get expensive quick, but it also can be done on the cheap. So put up flyers for the pharmacy at your parish (make sure to ask permission–it should be fine, though). With the same redundancy reasoning, also consider:
• Putting a link for the pharmacy’s web site on your parish site/ personal site.
• Spread the word via social networking: Facebook, Twitter, Newsvine, etc.
• Invite the pharmacist to speak: The pharmacist/ pharmacy owner likely has a story on what lead them to take this leap. Their decision is a huge witness in and of itself, and they should be invited to tell their story. Places where they could speak: your local Respect Life Group, a local Catholic Medical Association (or other like-minded medical groups), a youth group, a local Medical Student Group, and others. Mike Koelzer, a pharmacist in Michigan, has got his own site for this purpose! If you’re in Michigan, give Mike a call!
• Pray for Pharmacists who still prescribe BC, and give them this pamphlet on discontinuing contraceptives if they are believers.

What are some of your ideas? Do you have a pharmacist in your area that’s not listed at OMS? Let me know!

Hey, I’m all for freelance writing. You may know I’m also for NFP.

However, I’m not for learning NFP from an article, let alone an article that’s 600 words.

While I admire this writer’s courage and innovation in writing about NFP in a secular venue (we need all the promotion we can get), I’m don’t think it’s a great idea to give a drive-by instruction (especially one that’s very incomplete!) in an article about NFP. It gives people who are new to NFP the impression that *this* is NFP, it’s that simple, and you’re ready to rock with fertility awareness.

Yikes! This certainly begs another post on learning through a book vs. learning from an instructor, but as you can see from the article, her description of NFP, while well intentioned, is really incomplete at best, and misleading at worst. There’s a lot of people looking for information on NFP on the web, and if this article was among the first things they found, they may have the impression they’re ready to go, which–depending on their intention and outlook–could be quite a negative experience.

So, would you jump on over to Suite101, and (kindly, charitably) invite this well-intentioned writer to THINK AGAIN on her approach to promoting NFP? Be sure to affirm and support her pro-NFP outlook, including your thoughts on a better way to begin.

(Please Note: if you want your comment to be posted, you need to register with Suite101. I didn’t join, and my comment, which is being moderated, still hasn’t been posted.)

(Ok, I don’t think it was really a tag–probably a utility marking–but it’s way more fun to imagine a pro-NFP graffiti artist!)

If you like the conversation between like-minded folks in the faith, join Faith & Family Magazine at their site for a comment convo on NFP Day: Wednesdays. I’ve not tried it before, but hope to have some time this Wednesday. I’ll let you know how it goes!

Front Range Primary Care Opens 2nd Family Medicine Clinic

Denver, CO (Vocus/PRWEB ) February 26, 2010 — Front Range Primary Care will open its second Colorado family medicine clinic on March 8th. The clinic, a 5,000 square foot facility co-located with AfterOurs Urgent Care, at 6895 E. Hampden, will offer both pediatric and adult health care services. Front Range Primary Care will operate on extended hours Monday through Friday, from 8 am to 7 pm and on Saturdays from 8:30 am to noon. AfterOurs Urgent Care will open in the spring to provide urgent care services in the evening and on weekends and holidays.

“We’ve co-located with AfterOurs Urgent Care at our Westminster clinic, and the arrangement has worked well for our patients. When they (a patient) need treatment outside of our hours of service, they simply consult with an AfterOurs physician. The next day, AfterOurs forwards us their treatment records for follow-up care,” said Lucas Hutchinson, Practice Administrator for Front Range Primary Care.

Front Range Primary Care staffs board certified physicians, treats men, women, and children of all ages, and even offers obstetrics, gynecology and natural family planning at certain locations (ask for Dr. Vera). Same day appointments and walk-ins are welcomed. For more information call (303) 218-7758 or visit www.FrontRangePrimaryCare.com.

About Front Range Primary Care Front Range Primary Care treats patients of all ages, offering one convenient health care home for the entire family. Front Range currently operates a state of the art facility in Westminster, Colorado, with a second opening March 8, 2010 in Denver, Colorado.

This Thursday’s ThAT post is a positive one. Normally, ThAT’s are for email writing or combox campaigns for people to change erroneous opinions or public information on Natural Family Planning, but this week, I invite you to nominate somebody that you know who promotes or teaches Theology of the Body, and has done so amidst difficulties or with a heroic beauty.

Here’s the guidelines:

The Congress will seek to recognize outstanding accomplishments in promoting, living and understanding the Theology of the Body. Excellence demonstrated in Theology of the Body through the various fields of arts, academia, social justice, diocesan outreach, parish outreach, publishing, catechesis, activism, evangelization will be considered.

If you would like to nominate yourself [really?] or another individual, please fill out the form below. All nominations must be received by May 31, 2010, and can only be submitted through the web site.

The Theology of the Body Congress Awards Banquet will be held on Thursday evening, July 29.

There are several people I would like to nominate. However, for those in the Madison, Wisconsin area, you may wish to join me in nominating Marriage & Family Life Director Andy Galvin for the groundbreaking work he has done in the Family Life Office there. After only three years in this position, he has accomplished so much amidst difficult, criticism and his own family’s suffering. He’s extremely faithful, courageous, and lives Theology of the Body authentically in his own life. If you agree, share this link, and encourage others to pass it along, too!

Who would you nominate?

There's no easy button for NFP, which is why it's so great.

Many couples find themselves between a rock and a hard place, namely, between the Rock & NFP. They (particularly Christians) choose NFP for any combination of reasons, including moral, practical, relational and medical. Some NFPers are well formed in their faith and gung-ho from the beginning, but some are skeptical and need a little encouragement.

In the latter scenario, you may hear the following pitches by NFP instructors, marriage preparation coordinators, friends or pastoral associates:

It’s just as effective as contraception!

It’s marriage insurance: NFP users almost never get divorced.

NFP is really simple.

It’ll bring you two together like nothing else.

NFP is totally legit.

Now before your trigger finger hits the combox, hear me out. What’s wrong with introducing NFP with the following statements? I say, a lot. There’s nothing patently false about the above statements. In fact, they’re true. However, these statements should come within the context of a well-formed and universal perspective on marriage, sexuality and NFP. Otherwise, you’re presenting NFP as a marital panacea (just like contraception is presented as a panacea) without exception, and this doesn’t do anyone a favor, to say the least.

It reinforces our culture of convenience and the quick ‘n easy approach to life, which in the end is no short cut at all. See my qualified versions of these statements:

It’s just as effective as contraception! (Not the full truth. This presents NFP as just “Catholic Contraception.” Though the end can be the same–97-99% effectiveness at postponing pregnancy, it’s fundamentally different. Further, NFP can also be used to achieve pregnancy for those wanting to get pregnancy, as well as identify health issues and causes of infertility.)

It’s marriage insurance: NFP users almost never get divorced. (I don’t doubt the logic behind this–I’ve seen it in action. However, I’ve done the research, and the studies that quote NFP user divorce rates at around 2% are not methodologically airtight. I think the hypothesis is correct, but better studies need to be conducted. Further, this is usually stated in such a matter-of-fact way as to sound like NFP=perfect, happy marriage. It’s not just about the method; it’s about the whole marital package, which may include NFP.)

NFP is really simple. (NFP isn’t rocket science, but it’s not as easy as swallowing a pill or getting a periodic shot. I think NFP’s selling point is precisely that it requires effort. The things worth learning require effort. What makes NFP work for couples is that it requires knowledge, effort, responsibility and self control. If you can’t listen, chart, record, be responsible, communicate and control yourself, think twice about marriage because it requires all those virtues. NFP stands for “Not For the Pusillanimous.“ But that’s it’s strength.)

It’ll bring you two together like nothing else. (No barriers, natural sex and shared responsibility tend to bring people together, but if you have unhealthy communication, unequal commitment to NFP or relationship issues to begin with, NFP will not solve those issues for you. You have to work at those, and once you’re both committed and can communicate in a healthy, selfless way about it, it will totally bless your relationship.)

NFP is totally legit. (Yup, sure is. However, for Catholics, you can’t just use it to postpone pregnancy at will because you feel like it for selfish, non-serious reasons. The fourth marriage vow says that you will be open to children. While this doesn’t mean you have to have as many children as physically possible, it does mean you understand that sex is awesome, uniting and bonding, but that sex also means babies. The Church leaves it up to the couple’s discretion to discern what is a just, serious or grave reason, but what gets me is that this part of the equation is usually left out. If it does get a mention, it’s in passing, with no guidelines on how to discern this.)

Bottom line: proper formation in NFP classes is so key, which means NFP Instructors need to have great formation, not only in the methodology, but in the theology and morality.

Another key aspect, which is much more lacking than proper formation, is support for couples after the class is over. Theoretically, approved NFP methods are supposed to have ample follow up. This is usually the case that charting follow ups happen, and follow ups (in person or over the phone) are very helpful in getting through the nuances of NFP charting and interpretation.

However, sometimes women have irregularities in the mucus or other biological signs of fertility, and the level of difficulty increases because it may mean (if they’re postponing pregnancy) that their days of abstinence are longer, therefore increasing the sacrifice and oftentimes stress in the relationship. This isn’t inherently a bad thing, as difficulties dealt with virtue bring many graces and bless a relationship. However, if a couple has been told “NFP is a snap,” “Days of abstinence are 3-5 days,” and “You’ll totally love it!” without much other formation, they will be understandably disappointed.

In Joshua B’s refreshingly honest post at Evangelical Catholicism, he says it straight out: NFP needs to be properly introduced and taught, and it shouldn’t be presented as a marital cure-all.  I TOTALLY AGREE!!! Joshua goes on to talk about the need for the couple to be open with their teachers, even with the emotional/ sexual/ relational side of things. However, it’s not always the case that the conversation goes in this direction, or that couples are comfortable discussing their questions about X-Y-Z with Mr. & Mrs. NFP Teacher. This explains the huge prevalence of NFP Message boards, the e-equivalent of the sewing circle, which are usually gender segregated (on purpose or by nature). Somehow it’s more comfortable to discuss foreplay, sexual frustration, questions about what’s illicit/ unchaste sexually in the “safety” of online friendships than a face to face convo with your teacher, whom you hardly know and face judgement from.

The last thing I want to mention, which Joshua B. brings up in his second post on “Troubles with NFP”, is that sometimes couples have difficulty with a method, which can happen for a number of reasons. It may be a difficulty with recording temperatures, keeping up with the mucus classifications, an intuitive difficulty, or a health issue that their particular method isn’t helping them with. This is where NFP Instructors need to be trained well enough, and be familiar with other methods, so that they can openly and happily refer a couple to another method or another Instructor. Thankfully, this does happen, and couples find the right fit, not giving up on NFP.

However, as I lament here in point #3, many NFP Instructors become such fans of their method and their own NFP community to the detriment of the wider NFP community. They forget NFP Instructors for other methods are their friends and colleagues sometimes, even going so far as to misquote other methods’ statistics (perhaps just through lack of knowledge) and act as if their own method is THE method for everyone. It’s awesome to be a die-hard promoter of your method, but to act as if your method has absolutely the answer for every couple and every temperament is naive at best, and leads to a prideful, self-centered manner that, in the end, is fruitful for nobody. So we really need to encourage inter-method dialogue and learning so that we can understand eachothers’ methods, the data on other methods, and even learn about the beauty of other methods and what sets them apart.

Hopefully I don’t sound like a total Debbie Downer, but I want to bring a little self-examination to NFP groupies (of which I’m one) who sometimes get a little over-enthusiastic in our cheer-leading. After this somber editorial, what are some positive things we can do:

• Sit in on your instructors’ classes (for NFP Coordinators/ Supervisors): If distance doesn’t prevent you, be a regular observer in classes.  I would  have never known of some of the formation issues at hand if I hadn’t sat in on classes. Your instructors shouldn’t fear your presence as if your sole job is being Big Sister, but it is part of your work to check the quality and accuracy of instruction, and affirm instructors who are doing a great job.
• Hold formation classes or informal meetings for NFP Instructors (for NFP Coordinators/ Supervisors): One way to correct mistakes or preemptively get at problem areas is to offer formation classes periodically. Make it interesting and fun, and offer babysitting if you can for parents. This way you can encourage dialogue between the methods, have Q&A, and find out yourselves how instructors are handling the difficult issues. Topics to cover: The dos & dont’s about speaking on NFP, how to promote a class, reaching out to the cohabiting couple, difficult cases, Theology of the Body review, and prayerful discernment of just and serious reasons.
• Start a Family Support Group: It’s not just about NFP, but that will certainly be part of this. You can do this virtually for free with volunteers and some intra-parish promotion, or you can hire Alexander House (or a similar family aposotolate) who offers a Covenant of Love Program to help you coordinate this.
• Pray for your couples: We shouldn’t just pray for people to discover NFP and give up contraception. We need to continually offer our apostolate (whether it’s giving talks, NFP instruction or promotion) in prayer, and to pray for those will will be, are, or have been under our care.
• Reach out: Make sure your couples know that they can reach you, personally but also by phone/ email. Also, get to know them as much as you can. In your one-one-one time or follow ups, ask them about themselves (obviously within reason) and get to know them. They can’t ask you the difficult questions if they don’t know you or trust you.
• Be refreshingly honest: If you’ve had a struggle with NFP that turned out well, share it! An honest story about a real struggle is worth so much. It makes us human, and lends credibility when counseling couples.

What other suggestions do you have?

Came across a great post about how to get my posts on demand without manually checking back every day. A couple different ways to get me automatically:

1. Sign up for email posts by clicking the “Sign up for email” link in the upper right hand of the blog.
2. Google Reader (better if you have multiple blogs you follow, especially if they post often)
3. RSS Feed (The blog and new entries are bookmarked in your Internet browser)
4. More….

For more information on how to get on the RSS train, see The Mystery of RSS Readers, a great little how to.

Reminder to those Google Readers already subscribed: have you reset your “follow” address from nfpworks.wordpress.com to the new domain, nfpworksblog.com? This helps me to keep track of how many Google friends I’ve got, so it’s much appreciated!