My parish

I live in the least populated and most rural state in the US, and probably the most rural and needy Catholic dioceses. I attend and serve St. Stephen’s Parish, the mission on the Wind River Indian Reservation, and one of the poorest parishes. The Jesuits served here for over a hundred years, and in August 2010, the mission changed hands into the Society of Our Lady of the Holy Trinity (SOLT), a struggling but essentially faithful and beautiful order.

The fruit of SOLT’s presence

I can’t tell you the difference their presence has made. While serving on the reservation is a serious struggle (I can’t begin to tell you), especially for non-native apostles, I’ve seen an increase in participation in the sacraments, at Mass and Confession especially. They’ve started weekly adoration for the needs of the parish, pray the Liturgy of the Hours in common in the parish church, started a charity clothing closet, and several catechetical efforts.

NFP Awareness Need

In conjunction with our pastor Fr. John Gaffney, I’m trying to increase the awareness of Theology of the Body, Natural Family Planning, fertility care and healing over pregnancy loss. We just ordered 40 Pure Intimacy booklets, 3 Why NFP CDs (for the SOLT clergy), but that used up half of their remaining (tiny) resource budget. We still need brochures on the dangers of birth control, pregnancy loss healing, and more clergy resources.

Please consider tithing during Respect Life month in the form of a purchase of catechetical gifts. The need on the res is so great, and there is a profound spiritual crisis here. Above all, please keep St. Stephen’s Mission in your prayers. If you’d like to help at all (no gift or purchase is too small), leave a comment below, and I’ll contact you. If you can’t help, please share this post in your social networks.

Wish List 

• [Update: Purchased items will feature a strikethrough.]
• Catholic Answers: Pure Intimacy Booklets (50–you can get a bulk/ parish rate), Birth Control–What’s the Big Deal? Pamphlets (1 pack)  
• One More Soul: Why NFP is a Priority in My Parish (2), Reaching the Cafeteria Catholic CD (2), Prove It God…And He Did–testimony CD (10), What a Woman Should Know About Birth Control (50-100), Testimony of Healing: Sterilization Reversal (2)
• Ascension Press: Theology of the Body for Teens Bundle (1), Theology of the Body for Beginners (10), Proclaiming Theology of the Body for Clergy (1)
• Other: Contraception: Why Not (10-50)

If NFP is the natural and supernatural in family planning, then IVF is the opposite of that, the bastard child of modern science and the avaricious attitude that one is owed a child. But, sadly enough, not enough people know about it–scientifically or morally–and most people who struggle with infertility have no idea that there are IVF alternatives out there.

I know two out of the four presenters for this years Catholic United for Life Conference in Cody (from my work in the Diocese of Madison), but trust me–all four are all stars of the Catholic speaking and Pro Life activist circuit.

For many people the term “Pro Life” means simply the fight to end abortion, but this year’s conference theme, “Making Sense of In Vitro Fertilization & Embryonic Stem Cell Research” drives home the point that Pro Life fights for human dignity on all fronts from conception to natural death, regardless of disability or ability.

Did you know that currently there are 800, 000+ conceived children, “unwanted” byproducts of IVF procedures, simply frozen and waiting to be destroyed? What happens to them? Why were they “made” in the first place? If you’ve wondered what the big deal about IVF or Stem Cell Research is all about, come hear this nationally and internationally renowned line up make the case. Plus, you’ll get to connect with fellow lovers of life as well!

If you’ve not seen the poster/ brochure locally, here it is. Admittedly, I should have done this blog post sooner, but if you really want to come to this conference, they can still make room (although you might have to brown bag it for lunch). Bottom Line: RSVP to Symona ASAP: 307-754-1026. You’ll thank yourself. See you there.

This is exactly why we need to make their parishes NFP parishes, and why we need to hear more about the evils and ills of contraception, and the call to chastity within marriage. Send this testimony to your Bishop, DRE, parish priest, or church pastor/ leader, asking them to make NFP a priority in their Diocese/ Parish/ faith community. (Thanks for sharing your story, Dustin.)

See also:

• Priests & Bishops: If you promote NFP, Vocations will come (includes a guide to clergy resources)
• Carlson links Vocations “crisis” to Contraception

…and we’re back. Over the last couple weeks, unemployment malaise has taken its toll, and I’ve just not had the desire to write, neither on the blog nor any of my freelance work.

But this past week I got the chance to sit in on the first night of a weekday marriage preparation seminar called God’s Plan for a Joy-Filled Marriage, something that was launched here in Denver, and is done in Madison, Wisconsin as well (where I moved from). Besides being the wordiest marriage prep moniker out there, it’s in my opinion one of the best, if not the best marriage preparation supplement out there.

It’s a supplement to the usual life skills/reflection and the other aspects of marriage preparation, but it’s foundational and indispensable in the marriage prep process. It’s based on John Paul II’s Theology of the Body, a contemporary and life-changing way of explaining life, vocation, love and sexuality that’s beautiful, difficult, engaging and freeing. It’s essentially a full day seminar (or done on two week nights or retreat format) with six talks explaining what the big deal about sacramental marriage is, and why the Church teaches what she teaches, using Theology of the Body (infused with other resources) as it applies to the vocation of marriage.

It’s not all talks, though. It’s interspersed with reflection time, breaks, and DVD’s of Christopher West giving the talks. Actually, the curriculum comes with West doing the entire day, so you could play the DVD’s for the whole day if you wanted to, though I wouldn’t recommend it. The best combination is to plan your own talks (using the curriculum as your guide), weaving in your own witness and experience. I recommend using West at points throughout the day because, though he’s not everyone’s favorite, he’s got mad gifts, and can explain TOB in an accessible way many, many people find engaging and ultimately, enlightening.

The bottom line is that most people view the Church’s teaching on marriage & sexuality as a long list of “no’s”, but it’s a love story, and invitation to love as God loves. I’ve lived my way, and I’ve lived God’s way of love and life, and I’ve found so much wholeness, healing, joy and (yes) humor in embracing the latter, and discovering Theology of the Body has just made it so much more profound.

My husband and I used to facilitate these days back in Madison, and next week, I get to jump back into things by giving an NFP talk. My inspiration is returning….

What about yours? My challenge for you: suggest alternate names for the GPFJFM program!

Any other God’s Plan Facilitators out there? How’s it going? Difficulties? Joys? Do share….

Melchior Broederlam (1381-1409) Presentation in the Temple & Flight to Egypt Tempera on wood, 1393-1399

I feel sorry for Simeon, Anna, the Holy Family and the turtledoves. They get overlooked for a groundhog. In their humility, they might rejoice at the humor of this, but I for one think it’s a shame.

Today is the feast of the Presentation, called The Encounter in the east. It’s an amazing feast day in the Catholic/ Orthodox Churches (both east and west tend to celebrate it on the same day), but way underrated and under celebrated. It is also the foundation feast day of the Oratory of St. Philip Neri in England, founded on vespers of the Presentation by Fr. John Henry Newman (later to become Cardinal, and whose Beatification will be May 2, 2010).

The mystery of the Presentation can be meditated upon without exhausting it. This drama in the temple has much to teach us about waiting for the Lord, God’s will in our life, prophecy, death, vocation, sacrifice,  family, poverty, consecrated life , the Cross and much more.

For me, it is a fusion of meditation on the two main vocations of the Church: that of married life, and that of consecrated life or priesthood. Here we see the relationship between the two, the image of a holy marriage which gives rise to the earliest of vocational dedication. Not only is Christ, the Anointed, dedicated in the temple, but we see very prominently the consecrated and prophetic Simeon & Anna. (See my blog entry on holy families & holy vocations here.)

It is also one of the handful of times that we see (but never hear) St. Joseph. His actions are worth much more than a thousand words, and for this reason  and many others I’ve come to love St. Joseph dearly. He found me first, and I’ve come to love my spiritual father greatly. This is why when invited to speak on NFP to a men’s group, I didn’t choose Humanae Vitae or Casti Conuubi, but rather St. Joseph.

In October 2008, I gave a talk to the Knights of Divine Mercy, a men’s fraternal group and apostolate in the Madison Diocese, called “Surge, accipe puerum: reflections on St. Joseph.” It’s not strictly about NFP, but its message is related. I used a number of sources, from books to encyclicals, but it was a friend’s apostolic motto and article on St. Joseph that sparked the Josephine theme. In the end, it became a meditation on Fatherhood (spiritual and biological), and discernment about God’s will for your family, vocation and apostolate. Where is the Lord leading you?

Fast forward to the second track for the reflection on the Presentation.

Related links/ articles:

• Feast of the Presentation overview (and suggestions for ways to celebrate) at Catholic Culture
• The Chivalry of St. Joseph by Stratford Caldecott
• Cardinal Newman’s Sermon on the Feast of the Presentation, foundation day of the Oratory of St. Philip Neri in England
• John Paul II’s 1998 Homily on the feast of the Presentation

FREE Talks in Madison: Christopher West is making two appearances in Madison, Wisconsin this February, so mark your calendars, Wisconsonians.

God, Sex, and the Meaning of Life

Date(s): February 18th, 7pm
Location: Univ. of Wisconsin/Madison – The Great Hall in the Memorial Union
716 Langdon Street
Madison WI, 53706
Contact: Nico Fassimo
Phone: 612-867-6780
Email: nicofassino@gmail.com
Cost: This is a free event!
Description: This talk introduces a new “vision for life” designed for those who are new to the Theology of the Body. The message can be life-changing. Many will come to see, perhaps for the first time, who they really are—and who they are called to be. God’s plan for us is stamped right into our bodies, and understanding this plan will give attendees a new lens through which to see their lives, relationships, and the world around them. Christopher West will address and answers some of the most fundamental questions of human existence. Mike Mangione will also be performing.

Your Call to Greatness–St. Therese Lecture Series

Date(s): February 19th, 7pm (RSVP–seating is limited)
Location: Bishop O’Connor Catholic Pastoral Center
702 South High Point Road
Madison WI, 53744
Contact: Andy Galvin
Phone: 608-821-4517
Email: andy.galvin@straphael.org
Description: This talk introduces a new “vision for life” designed for those who are new to the Theology of the Body. The message can be life-changing. Many will come to see, perhaps for the first time, who they really are—and who they are called to be. God’s plan for us is stamped right into our bodies, and understanding this plan will give attendees a new lens through which to see their lives, relationships, and the world around them. Christopher West will address and answers some of the most fundamental questions of human existence.

Em, I'm looking for more correct information on NFP. Anyone?

Here’s the belated Think Again Thursday post, and one I’ve wanted to do for a couple weeks since I read about Cherie Blair’s latest verbal blunder regarding family planning.

Now Mrs. Blair’s no rookie in the Church teaching disobedience department. She’s a regular on the the-Church-should-change-her-teaching-on-contraception circuit, grinding her axe at every turn. In fact, the article prompting this latest edition of Think Again Thursday is a perfect example. It’s evidently a piece about her attitude about money, lifestyle and don’t miss this segueway, “Mrs Blair also says in the interview, in the January edition out on Thursday, that MPs have been pilloried over their expenses. ‘They saw it as an allowance, which is not the same thing.’…An ardent Catholic, she says she hopes that the Church will change its view on contraception.” I’m sorry, what does one have to do with the other? Journalism has gone as far downhill as faith.

Theological misinformation and journalistic disability aside, my beef is largely with this statement, which I believe my readers (of all faiths/ political viewpoints) will have a problem with (the money line in bold):

The Church says that sex is not just for procreation and does allow the natural form of contraception. Personally, I think it is better to go for contraception that works, which is quite different from abortion.

In this letter writing campaign, I’d like to find out if this is the correct quote, as the syntax here isn’t exactly the well-worded style of an experienced barrister.

That aside, it’s clear that legal education and worldly knowledge don’t exactly equal understanding and certainly not wisdom. Would you help me in blogging about this, and in particular by contacting Mrs. Blair to correct and clarify the statement that NFP doesn’t work?

My fellow Catholics may wonder why I’m not calling for a firm correction of her misunderstanding of Christian teaching on marriage, sexuality, family and family planning. I’m glad you asked. Personally, I will send her a Theology of the Body text, either Theology of the Body for Beginners (West) or Called to Love (Anderson), and will invite her to a further broadening of her and mind and formation. However, I don’t make as big a deal of it as I’d like to here because, frankly, she seems like a prideful person who’s more open to science than faith. And I’d really like her to see that even in a secular, medical sense–she’s wrong.

It is interesting that Mrs. Blair is clearly accomplished in a worldly sense, and is passionate about women’s issues, yet continues to promote health “services,” particularly contraception, that have NOT liberated women as originally thought. In this review of a number of sociological, economical and anthropological studies one thing is clear: free love wasn’t free, and contraception, the fuel for the sexual revolution, was less of a liberator and more of an arsonist for society. Ironically, women, minorities and children have suffered the most. “We must make it crystal clear that the church’s commitment to the poor requires nothing less than a vigorous proclamation of the church’s true and beautiful teaching about sex and marriage. In other words, we must make it clear that the preferential option for the poor begins in the home.” If Mrs. Blair is concerned about social justice for the women, children and the poor, then she needs to THINK AGAIN about her stance on contraception.

Contact information for Mrs. Blair:

Email: mediarequest@cherieblairoffice.org
Cherie Blair Foundation

Physical Address (c/o the Tony Blair Office):

The Office of Tony Blair
P.O. Box 60519
London
W2 7JU
United Kingdom

Guideline text:

[Salutation of your choice]

You have a wide reputation as an intelligent woman, and a proponent of women’s liberation and rights. I’m writing to say that I am as well, and I thank you for many of your efforts to promote social justice.

[Something brief about yourself.]

I’m also passionate about social justice, and have found personally that natural methods of family planning (or NFP) have been extremely liberating not only in my life, but in the life of women and families around the world. I found it interesting to note, however, in a recent interview that you were quoted as dismissing natural methods of family planning, saying “Personally, I think it’s better to go for contraception that works.” You are an educated and intelligent woman. Did you actually say this?

If so, not only does NFP “work” to postpone pregnancy, but this journal article from the Journal of the American Board of Family Medicine even recommends that it’s something all OB/GYN’s and family practice physicians could benefit from learning and even teaching.

http://www.jabfm.org/cgi/content/full/22/2/147

You may also be interested in this study by UK researchers, in which lead researcher Dr Petra Frank-Herrmann said: “We maintain that the effectiveness of the Sympto-thermal method is comparable to the effectiveness of modern contraceptive methods such as oral contraceptives, and is an effective and acceptable method of family planning.” (Human Reproduction 2007 22(5):1310-1319; doi:10.1093/humrep/dem003)

For a clinical web site with information on one of several modern NFP methods with a medical imprimatur, see www.fertilitycare.org.

[optional:] I know that your unfavorable and under-informed opinion of NFP perhaps comes from a prejudice against the Catholic Church’s constant teaching on marriage and family which you see as oppressive, but be assured of two things: first, many, many users of NFP (or Fertility Awareness Method) are not Catholic, or even particularly religious. Second, the Church’s teaching are hugely misunderstood, but are being rediscovered anew in recent decades. They are joyfully embraced by youth and older adults alike, both by lifetime Catholics and those (like me) who lived the contraceptive life and found it wanting. I would like, for this reason to share a cause of my joy, and gift to you [item you're enclosing].

Thank you for your consideration.

Very Sincerely,

[an NFP fan]

I was resting from blogging Sunday, but wanted to share a great homily on the feast of the Holy Family, December 27 this year by Fr. Robert Barron (h/t to Fr. Jason Cargo for the link).

I also went to Mass tonight at the Denver Cathedral, and Archbishop Chaput gave one of the most rockin’ homilies on family life that I’ve heard–covering the gift of fertility, the suffering of infertility, the ills of contraception and IVF, encouraging vocations in the family, and a word to families touched by divorced (and much more). When that gets posted online, I’ll give you the link.

UPDATE: Archbishop’s Homily from Holy Family is now posted here!

Three cheers for George & Eileen Finnin, Directors of the Philadelphia Area Natural Family Planning Network. Along with Wichita’s rock star NFP Coordinator, CCL Chicago Chapter and a handful of other fervent NFP advocates, they’re harnessing the power of the press release and letters to the editor! They published this Op-Ed piece in the November 28 edition of the Philadelphia Bulletin, which isn’t exactly the NY Times, but is a good example of using the media to get out the word. I challenge the Finnins and others to take the next step, using their ingenuity to take the op-ed/ letter to the editor to the next level, and sumbit it to a more secular newspaper or women’s mag.

• Have you seen any other inventive press releases or letters to the editor?
• What’s the best NFP-related writing you’ve seen out there, something that made you smile, think, or clap your hands?

Do you belong to the “NFP cult”?

Blogger and Seattle acquaintance Mark Shea recently gave NFPworks a little nod in a post, which has attracted a clergyman in the combox who snarkily calls (and implies that I think this) NFP the “8th Sacrament” and a sympathetic commenter implies that NFP fans are (or can be) “worshippers” of the “NFPcult.”

Now [taking a deep breath]. If you listen to this homily by Fr. Chad Ripperger, FSSP, which isn’t the priest in the combox, but it seems that they must be on the same page. (I’d really like to hear Fr. Perroni affirm this.)

Anyhow, the homily, unlike most watered-down, feel good verbosity is actually catechetical, and really quite decent. I appreciate the frank approach to catechesis that doesn’t underestimate his congregation. (Though I have a feeling this homily wasn’t given in the average suburban parish–I’d like to see that!)

“Contraception is against every category of ‘natural inclination’.” [Amen.]

I like how he begins by explaining the natural law, quoting St. Thomas, giving examples, and then speaks at length about Holy Matrimony and the Nuptial Act. I like what he has to say–even the part where he strongly emphasizes that NFP is only to be used for just, serious and grave reasons! Despite what Fr. Perroni and friends might think of this, I agree! I may not hit people over the head with my “grave reasons stick” when I begin a conversation with a Catholic (or non-Catholic) on contraception, but I believe what HMC teaches, and stick to it.

“Provided you have the right intention…it’s a morally licit thing.” [Amen.]

Then he goes on to articulate that artificial insemination and In Vitro Fertilization violate the unity of meaning of the nuptial act, meaning that they separate the unitive (by diminishing or eliminating the need for a physical union) from the procreative (the openness to children and hopefully conception).

“Some Catholics mistakenly believe that because the Church is pro-family and pro-children, that somehow that means that any means whatsoever is okay to attain having children, and that’s not true. The Church doesn’t allow us to do that precisely because she does not want us to violate the rule of God, and ultimately for us to lose our souls as a result of it.” [Amen.]

But he quickly transitions to his discussion of the Church’s only approved method of postponing pregnancy (as well as achieving pregnancy and diagnosing women’s wellness issues, the latter which he omits, either for brevity or lack of knowledge on this): NFP. Here’s where we transition to a more reactionary slippery slope:

“It is a mortal sin to use NFP without a sufficient reason.” [Well...yes and no. Debatable.]

Diocesan Family Life Offices & NFP Instructors: OUCH.

“The teaching of NFP , however, has become a bit problematic as of late. In addition to the fact that some people treat it like it’s the 8th Sacrament, and somehow or another if you’re not practicing NFP when you’re married that you’re committing sin–it’s silly, and quite frankly, it’s insulting to people’s intelligence.”

“It’s okay to teach philosophy or the philosophical and theological dimensions to NFP in a common group–I don’t have any problem with that; it’s a good thing. (And by common group we mean mixed company, and things of that sort.)”

“But there are practices that have arisen in virtually every diocese in this country in which detailed anatomical descriptions and even pictures of the two genders is given to people in mixed company. Now let me set this up as a scenario: you have  people who are about to get married. The struggle for chastity is extreme already. And then they put pictures in front of them, and then they wonder why they’re fornicating. Hello!? The fact of the matter is that this is putting people in the proximate occasion of sin. It’s mortally sinful to be doing this….But to actually give anatomical details to people before they’re married in mixed company is utterly inappropriate.“

“It’s mortally sinful to be doing this [giving NFP classes to couples before they're married in mixed company]…It’s a sin against modesty!”

Soo…..where to begin?

First, I don’t think being part of the NFP Movement–either by using it, promoting it or teaching it, that it makes one a de facto member of the “NFP cult.” (See my newly revised “About” section to know where I stand on this.)

However, Father does have a point that some people become so devoted to Natural Family Planning, and are so eager to “convert” contraceptive users, that they pitch NFP in such a way as to present it as “Catholic Birth Control” or “Catholic Contraception.” This is wrong, and I hint at this a bit in my “7 Habits” post. It’s true. Sometimes in our enthusiasm for the Church’s teaching against contraception, we give the impression that NFP is a requirement to be holy, and that it’s a given in marriage, when, in fact, NFP (if you’re Catholic), is to be used only to achieve pregnancy, postpone pregnancy for just, serious or grave reasons, or to identify, diagnose and treat women’s wellness issues, including infertility.

Second, I also believe modesty is a vital virtue, one that’s lost on our generation nearly completely. However, to essentially equate an NFP class (and therefore–GASP! Anatomy diagrams!) to pedalling pornography IS RIDICULOUS! Further to accuse nearly every diocesan program (and therefore the individuals running the program, and their bishops!) who sponsors NFP Instruction for the engaged (for most it’s optional, and a few mandatory) OF MORTAL SIN WITHOUT EXCEPTION OR MITIGATION scandalizes me, frankly.

Father clearly leans towards concupiscence with his mention of the “scandal of NFP instruction,” but it seems to me he may not be aware of who the average couple getting married in the Church is. (Now that I think about it, he probably does know and wouldn’t witness the vows of most of the people getting married today.) Diagrams which enable them to learn about and appreciate God’s gift of fertility most likely don’t scandalous those going through NFP Instruction, and certainly wouldn’t scandalize the average couple who frankly are largely already sexuality active and cohabitating.

Prudence is the key to chastity and modesty. Obviously, if a couple has a sensitivity to things sexual or a tendency to lust, and their purity is strong and sensitive, then heck no–stay away from the NFP classes! But by and large, these are not the couples who are going through Engaged Formation in Diocesan programs.

Kyrie Eleison. I’ve gone on long enough. There’s a balance between the “cult of NFP” and the reactionary extremism of aforementioned brands of providentialism as fostered by certain clergy.

What do you think the balance is?

[Update: The discussion in the combox has brought some balanced perspectives, but mostly not. It seems that most people did not listen the homily and statement in question, nor did many care to reply to points made in my actual post. Comments are now closed.]

After seeing this clip of The View (which you may or may not like, depending on your politics–watch it anyway) featuring a very strong and family oriented Rachel Campos-Duffy, I decided to find out who this firebrand mother was. After finding out that we have some very strong worldview connections.

I started following her on Twitter, and found a link to this piece, “Whatever Happened to Large Catholic Families?” (Geocache that!)

Good stuff. Certainly not an analysis piece aiming to answer that question per se, but definitely a look at the current shallow fascination with large families, and testimony to the enduring value of large families. She should be the Population Research Institute’s spokesperson for their Overpopulation is a Myth Campaign (newly added to the blogroll)!

By the way, I think the answer to her article’s question is: the same place where Catholic spines and authentic Church teaching went, probably stored in the closet where the plasma TV boxes are in the garage where people’s three cars are parked.